Candidate Profile: Democratic VP Nominee Kamala Harris

Former Vice President Joe Biden defends his record on racial issues as Senator Bernie Sanders and Senator Kamala Harris listen during the second night of the first U.S. Democratic presidential candidates 2020 election debate in Miami, Florida, U.S., June 27, 2019. REUTERS/Mike Segar – HP1EF6S06WJJY

August 13, 2020 (

Senator Kamala Harris was announced Tuesday as Joe Biden’s vice presidential pick for the 2020 Democratic Party ticket. The Onion takes a look at Harris’ background, political history, and what she brings to the 2020 election.

Ethnicity: Perfect, just perfect.

Childhood Dream: Waiting for the president to die in office.

Greatest Liability: Prominent association with Joe Biden.

Progressive Bona Fides: Provided housing to thousands of low-level offenders she convicted.

Signature Debate Moment: Nailing clarinet solo in talent portion.

How She Clinched VP Slot: Bonded with Biden over shared experience running extremely unsuccessful presidential campaigns.

Bite Force: 230 PSI.

Chances She’ll Shoot Friend In Face On Hunting Trip: Low.

Number Of Times Biden Has Called Her Michelle So Far: 23.

Contribution To Ticket: Centrist counterbalance to Biden’s centrism.

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