{"id":45938,"date":"2026-01-07T11:54:12","date_gmt":"2026-01-07T19:54:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/?p=45938"},"modified":"2026-01-07T11:54:13","modified_gmt":"2026-01-07T19:54:13","slug":"lost-jan-6-rioter-still-searching-capitol-building-for-mike-pence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/2026\/01\/07\/lost-jan-6-rioter-still-searching-capitol-building-for-mike-pence\/","title":{"rendered":"Lost Jan. 6 Rioter Still Searching Capitol Building For Mike Pence"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/theonion.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/Lost_Jan6_Rioter_NIB_G_PH.jpg?w=1024\" alt=\"\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Published: January 6, 2026 (TheOnion.com)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>WASHINGTON\u2014As he wandered aimlessly through the halls of the U.S. Capitol building, lost Jan. 6 rioter Alex Morris told reporters Tuesday that he was still searching for former Vice President Mike Pence. \u201cOh my God, how am I back in Statuary Hall again? Where the hell is Pence?\u201d said Morris, tucking a noose under his arm while opening Google Maps and reorienting himself in the direction of the National Mall. \u201cAt this point, I can barely remember why I wanted to hang the guy in the first place. It feels like I\u2019ve circled the Senate Chamber a million times. Does anyone know where Ashli Babbitt is? She knows her way around here.\u201d At press time, Morris reportedly attempted to jog his memory by taking a shit in the office of Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Published: January 6, 2026 (TheOnion.com) WASHINGTON\u2014As he wandered aimlessly through the halls of the U.S. Capitol building, lost Jan. 6 rioter Alex Morris told reporters Tuesday that he was still searching for former Vice President Mike Pence. \u201cOh my God, how am I back in Statuary Hall again? Where the&#8230; <a class=\"continue-reading-link\" href=\"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/2026\/01\/07\/lost-jan-6-rioter-still-searching-capitol-building-for-mike-pence\/\"> Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr; <\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45938"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=45938"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45938\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":45939,"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45938\/revisions\/45939"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=45938"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=45938"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=45938"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}