{"id":26664,"date":"2023-05-23T12:26:57","date_gmt":"2023-05-23T19:26:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/?p=26664"},"modified":"2023-05-23T12:26:58","modified_gmt":"2023-05-23T19:26:58","slug":"senate-freaking-out-after-dianne-feinstein-gets-her-hands-on-gun","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/2023\/05\/23\/senate-freaking-out-after-dianne-feinstein-gets-her-hands-on-gun\/","title":{"rendered":"Senate Freaking Out After Dianne Feinstein Gets Her Hands On Gun"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>PublishedFriday 2:00PM (TheOnion.com)<a href=\"https:\/\/www.theonion.com\/senate-freaking-out-after-dianne-feinstein-gets-her-han-1850455274\"><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i.kinja-img.com\/gawker-media\/image\/upload\/c_fit,f_auto,g_center,q_60,w_645\/a760ebfdc605b10bb052d838e39007c5.jpg\" alt=\"Image for article titled Senate Freaking Out After Dianne Feinstein Gets Her Hands On Gun\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>WASHINGTON\u2014Thrown into a panic when the confused 89-year-old appeared on the Senate floor randomly pointing a firearm at various colleagues, lawmakers reportedly freaked out Friday after Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) got her hands on a gun. \u201cGood God, someone get that thing away from her!\u201d said Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV), who ducked behind a chair as Feinstein rolled down the aisle and waved a 9 mm semiautomatic handgun in several faces, screaming that there were terrorists hiding in the attic and they had been poisoning her food. \u201cShe clearly doesn\u2019t understand what she\u2019s doing. If someone puts their hands up and approaches her slowly, maybe she\u2019ll just give it to you. It\u2019s probably not loaded. There\u2019s no way she\u2019s still lucid enough to know how to\u2014oh, shit, hit the deck!\u201d At press time, after appearing surprised to realize where she was and what she was doing, Feinstein was said to have calmly and systemically shot every member of Congress who has called for her resignation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>PublishedFriday 2:00PM (TheOnion.com) WASHINGTON\u2014Thrown into a panic when the confused 89-year-old appeared on the Senate floor randomly pointing a firearm at various colleagues, lawmakers reportedly freaked out Friday after Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) got her hands on a gun. \u201cGood God, someone get that thing away from her!\u201d said Sen&#8230;. <a class=\"continue-reading-link\" href=\"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/2023\/05\/23\/senate-freaking-out-after-dianne-feinstein-gets-her-hands-on-gun\/\"> Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr; <\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[96],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26664"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26664"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26664\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26665,"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26664\/revisions\/26665"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26664"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26664"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occupysf.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26664"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}